ZANG TUMMM TUMB ARTICLES “the first draft of history”

HOW TO RUN AWAY FROM A COUGAR IF YOURE A VERY FAMOUS POP STAR CALLED MADONNA PART 4:

FRANKIE GOES TO HOLLYWOOD

  1. Say “Wheres the cougar then matey? (Oh not this again—Ed.) “Right under your nose ackcheloi, except it looks rather like a lion,” reply a cast of thousands.
  2. Shriek with horror when two cougars appear, then try to kill them by standing on their backs!
  3. Escape in a useless car that doesnt have any wheels and administer some spooky old hand-signs.

A boring Bitz person writes: I think youll find these are photographs of Frankie Goes To Hollywood strimbling around playing “live” in a West German nighterie called “Discotek TARM-Canter” which is a very useless name for a nighterie. And it was recorded “live” for a German television programme called Peter Illman Treff which is a very useless name for a television programme. And they were spotted frolicking with members of the Human League, Iron Maiden and The Hoosemartins who were also playing “live”. Apart from all that, they spent most of their time “dismantling” a caravan (i.e. vandalising it) much to the disgust of The Hoosemartins. “Frankie Goes To Hollywood vandalising a caravan,” piped Morrissey, “is the undiscussable.” (Except he didnt.)