One to 1
Uh, s’cuse me. Am I in the right place? Oh good! I live in America so some of these questions are going to sound ridiculous, but bear with me, OK?
First, what is a record token? I swear I’ve never heard of any such thing. Could you send me one so I can see what they look like?
Also, could someone tell Frankie to come to Winston-Salem, North Carolina to play. I mean, if you play eight dates and call it a US tour, it’s not. They’ve got a lot of fans round here, more than they probably know.
Lindsay Jones, North Carolina, USA.
They’ve got a lot of fans round here, too, so just wait in line, girl!
Dear Frankie, what do you think you’re playing at? I’m talking about the ‘Pleasuredome’ souvenirs —
Do you really think the teenagers who go you to No.1 can afford the kind of prices you are charging?
An angry FGTH fan (Becki).
It’s high time that someone publicly stated that Holly Johnson is not sexy, nor in any way desirable.
He is, in fact, the most revoltingly ugly little twerp in the pop world at present (with Howard Jones coming a close second). I personally wouldn’t touch him with a bargepole.
Let’s hear more about good looking blokes like Suggs from Madness. Now he’s a real man.
A Madness fan.
OK, the Campaign for Real Men starts here. Nominations from the office so far include Sting, Martin Kemp, Paul Young, Paul Rutherford, All Campbell, Bono… What do you reckon? (And It’s not as easy as it sounds!)
What’s the difference between Frankie and a crossword puzzle?
Frankie haven’t got a single clue.
Stuart Hastee, Kirkbrae.
Here’s a poem to Holly Johnson as he’s my No.1.
Always in my room
The image of your face
I know I’ll never see you
But you’ll always remain my ace
I’d follow you to the pleasuredome
If you asked me I’d relax
And if two tribes came between us
I’d sock ‘em with an axe
Fame may always part us
But not from over my wall
My friends think I am crazy
But I don’t care at all
You’re my No.1, Holly
And I let everybody know
Maybe you are gay
But I still love you so
Justine, Frankie fanatic, Portsmouth.
Just thought I’d let you in on my little secret. I’ve just had a pretty well tubular idea for making oodles of money.
I’m going to ring up nice Michael Jackson and ask if he’d mind me re-mixing ‘Thriller’, then I’m going to have a chat with Trevor Horn and send him tapes of aforementioned LP.
I’d rope in Boy George for backing vocals and get Holly Johnson to do the odd gutsy ‘Yeah’.
The Edge has promised to add some guitar work and if I package the whole thing to include an exclusive poster of Duran and pictures of Wham and Spandau Ballet holding cheque books on the front then everyone except Paul Weller and Billy Bragg will buy it.
I’m going to call it ‘Thriller (Money-Making-Mix)’.
Wouldn’t it be simpler just to auction off Michael Jackson’s home phone number?
What I can’t understand is why Frankie Goes To Hollywood is such a big thing in the UK.
What do all those stupid signs or symbols mean?
What exactly is a XLZTT?
But the biggest puzzle for me is WHICH ONE IS THIS FRANKIE CHARACTER?
You English fans of this Frankie guy will love anything by this ‘God’ because of all the media hype. What is so special about them?
Lisa Woo, New York City, America.
Questions, questions, questions. You Americans just don’t understand our quaint British customs at all.
The worship of the Gud Frankie is a time-honoured ritual dating back thousands of years, but it is only recently that He has deigned to make public His manifesto. Just think of No.1 as His bible.
Just what have you come to? First of all you put Frankie Goes To Hollywood in half the magazine, and if that wasn’t bad enough Martin Townsend wrote a thoroughly untrue and unfounded review of Modern Romance’s new single.
Please leave such a talented, original group alone and let them get on with writing their great original songs.
Judith Gunner, Twickenham.
Yeah, ‘Everybody Salsa’ was pretty original, wasn’t it?