Wow! I’m in 3-D (Don’t adjust your eyes!)
Yep, here it is —
Sealhenry Samuel reclines in a dusty chair, peels an orange and watches in amusement as his manager fools around with a packet of Maltesers. Halfway through his first ever tour, the leather-kekked sauce god is catching a rare opportunity to just chill out, talk about the recent rugby results and chat to Number One.
“How’s it going, geezer?” is the way he greets the friends and colleagues who drift in and out of his makeshift dressing room, finalising the arrangements for his Wolverhampton show. Having just posed for the rather wonderful 3-D shot you see before you (remember to pop on your lovely 3-D glasses!) and with a rather nifty (nay, mind-blowing) video for his ‘Killer’ single finished, Seal’s schedule has been busy but the mood is, erm… relaxed. “It’s the first time I’ve ever done any 3-D pictures”, he explains, chewing on an orange segment or two. “So it’s all quite a new experience. I don’t know how they’ll turn out but I tried to do some action stuff, so hopefully they’ll be pretty good.”
So are you interested by the jiggery-pokery, new-fangledautomatic-daffodils, state-of-the-art, technological side of things?
“Yeah. The new video emphasises that. It’s done with something called, erm… (turns to Malteser-munching manager) what’s that technology called?”
His manager attempts to explain the brain-numbing boffin side of things and the amazing equipment used. None of which is comprehendable.
“There you go!” offers Seal helpfully.
HUNKSTER GRUMPSTER
The dreadlocked soulman features quite highly in the hunkster ratings. Posters galore adorn the walls of admirers the land over. But how does the man himself feel about jumping around in front of a camera then?
“Well, if I feel I don’t want to do it, I usually just don’t turn up to the shoot. Then again, sometimes you have to do things you don’t want to, because otherwise, they can be destructive to your career.”
Quite.
The video for Seal’s ‘Killer’, a different version of the hit he had with Adamski, uses an amazing mixture of 3-D effects and interstellar scenes. What’s even more special about it is that it can only be fully appreciated, in all its stunning glory, when seen through the exclusive Number One monocle attached to the specs on the little old front cover! Exciting or what?!
But tell us, Seal old chap, was it fun to make?
“Oh, it was all right”, he offers. “I find videos really boring to make. You have to go over the same bits of the song and give the same performance umpteen times, so it’s a fairly tedious process.”
Oh, erm… well, there must have been one vid you enjoyed? “Yeah, I enjoyed the ‘Crazy’ one; I enjoyed that very much. I got really into that.”
Hurrah!
SEWING AND STUFF (apparently)
There’s a lot of messing around with dolphins, fireballs and funny-shaped guitars in the new vid, but what’s the main theme?
“It’s about space travel, I suppose. A kind of Man Who Fell To Earth (weirdo ‘70s film starring Mister David Bowie as an alien sort) type thing.”
A spooksome kind of chappie too, this Seal, judging by the mystical bits.
“Yes, there’s a spiritual element in most things I do. I used to chant.”
You used to what?
“I used to practise Buddhism and chant ‘Namya Ho A Rengye Kyo’. Basically, it’s a quote from something called the Gosho (a series of letters written by an ancient Japanese Buddhist monk, apparently) and it puts you in touch with the thread of life.”
Cough.
WOULDN’T GIVE A MONKEY’S!
Britain is not the only joint that’s jumpin’ to Seal’s ‘vibes’, as they say. Recently, the shiny one has been on the other side of the Atlantic, testing the waters in America. The trip was not without its mishaps however.
“We rented a house out there,” he explains. “One day, the alarm went off and the police came round. They thought we were burglars and there wasn’t anyone to verify my existence in the house. I don’t think they’d give a monkey’s about who I was anyway.”
Does a popstrel like Seal miss his pals while traipsing across the globe in the name of rockity roll and so forth.
“Yeah, there are those, like my parents and friends, but my best friend always comes with me, so it’s all right.”
Anxious to rest his voice for the night’s performance, Seal graciously makes his apologies and departs. Hours later, the concert hall fills with people, buzzing with anticipation. Seal appears from behind white curtains and a roar goes up. To the delight of the crowd, the leather-coated one launches into a magnificent show, packed with soul, rock and a little of his own titbits.
As Seal paces the stage, whistling through his fingers, clapping and letting that rich, gravelly voice rip through the air, he has the crowd in his hand. As the screams of his adoring fans increase, his words fly back.
“Fame has changed me in some ways, yeah. But I think I’ve changed fame more than it’s changed me.”
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