Title: The wild bunch
The Wild Bunch or what are two nice boys like this doing in a magazine like Mizz?
Behind Holly’s flashy showmanship and Paul Rutherford’s designer labels lurk the rest of Frankie Goes To Hollywood — Peter ‘Ped’ Gill, Mark O’Toole and Brian ‘Nasher’ Nash. Known collectively as ‘The Lads’, they’ve gained themselves quite a reputation for being loud, lewd and — ahem — a bit partial to liquid lunches. We spoke to Ped and Hasher and found out that every word is true.
Ped and Nasher aren’t looking forward to this interview. They’re in the middle of a mammoth world tour and they’ve worn out and “well pissed off”. They don’t want to do the TV appearance they’re booked for tonight, and they don’t want to spend any more of their time sitting around in their hotel room. In fact, they don’t much want to do anything. On this hopeful note, we leave for the restaurant for a chat…
MR: You’re about to spend a year out of the country, aren’t you? Is that for tax reasons?
PG: We’ll be working for most of it. Mostly bloody touring, then recording the album, then probably a load more touring…
BN: All right, it does save us loads of money spending a year out of the country, but I hate people calling us tax exiles. It makes us sound dead greedy…
MR: What will you miss most while you’re away?
PG and BN: British ale.
MR: And what will you miss in the least?
PG: The British Press.
BN: Yeah, bloody journalists. They’re only interested in making us look like a load of drunken ******. The *******. I hate ‘em. They’re friendly to your face and stitch you up in print.
PG: Remember that girl who came and interviewed us one time, Nash? We was having a laugh with her and going, “Go on girl, get your kit off, show us your tits” and she got well narked. We were sexist *******’s straightaway. She just didn’t understand our sense of humour.
BN: Yeah. Like we had this journalist with us on tour and he made me look like a real drunken animal. I was drunk, I admit it, but I wasn’t out of me head like he said I was. I’d only had a bottle of Scotch…
MR: When people talked about FGTH, it always used to be Holly and Paul were the arty ones, and you and Mark O’Toole were dead normal. Lately, Mark seems to have got more into fashion than you two…
PG: Noticed that, have you? Old Johnny Spotlight…
BN: Anyway, Paul and Holly aren’t that arty, either. All five of us are dead normal — they just put on a front, that’s all. What do people say about Mark now? Do they think he’s a bit of a ******?
MR: No — they’ve just noticed that he’s started dressing a lot more like Paul Rutherford.
PG: Oh, he does that. If Paul comes in and says he’s just seen a pair of shoes for £200 and they’re really nice, Mark’ll say, “Ooh, get us a pair,” without even seeing them.
BN: We have more arguments about how much you should pay for a suit than about anything else. Paul will pay £1,700 for a Japanese suit he’ll wear for a month until it goes out of fashion.
PG: Yeah, or £2,000 for a leather jacket. It’s ******* ridiculous!
MR: How much would you pay for a suit then?
BN: I haven’t got a ********* suit!
PG: What else do people say about us?
MR: Urm — well, they say that Ped is really the leader of the gang, and that he can seem aggressive but really he’s very shy…
PG: Oh ****** off! Who said that? Have you been talking to my bird
about me? She always says I’m shy. When we meet people in the street, she’ll go, “Why didn’t you speak to them?” I’m just not into all that, “Hello, how are you, ooh, I’ve got the same pants on as you” lark. All that makes me puke.
MR: What about Mark O’Toole, what’s the best and worst things about him?
PG: Well, he’s a right Johnny-come-lately with all that poncey gear on him.
BN: And he’s a real lazy bastard as well. You can actually rely on Mark to be unreliable. He’s just bought himself a watch — it’s like buying a pair of socks when you’ve got no feet.
PG: He likes the girls. He’s supposed to be a pin-up, isn’t he? If he was here now, he’d probably be getting you going with his charm. He’d probably say, “Love your earrings, but you’re a right old dog”.
BN: He’s a good laugh when he’s pissed though. He has me wetting myself when he gets going.
PG: Paul’s a nice bloke — dead mildmannered. You can’t get him going about anything. He’s the original SDP member, though, sits on the fence about everything…
BN: And he’s right touchy, too. With Holly, you can wind him up, calling him a ****** pouf and a pervert and he just laughs. Say that to Paul and he goes all huffy, “Oh, go on Nash, get personal”.
PG: Holly doesn’t give a ***** about anything like that. And he’s the best showman in the business.
MR: If you could make three wishes each, what would you wish for?
BN: Can I have four wishes?
MR: No, you can’t.
BN: All right. I wish for a fourth number one single with ‘Welcome To The Pleasure Dome’, so we’d get into the history books as the only group to have four number ones with their first four singles. Then I suppose I’d better have good health all my life. Then I wish for a baby boy because otherwise I’ll be the last one in my blood line.
PG: You don’t half talk a load of shit, Nasher.
MR: What about you, Ped. What would you wish for?
PG: Er — a platinum American Express Card for a start. Then I’d I have a Lamborghini, or any other fast I car to get me out of here so I wouldn’t have to do any more ******* interviews And last I’d wish to still feel sane at the end of this ***** tour.
MR: You sound so fed up touring… Do you ever wake up in the morning and wish you’d never heard of Frankie Goes To Hollywood?
PG and BN: Yes.
MR: I noticed lots of young girls hanging around outside your hotel. Do you get a lot of groupies?
PG: Yeah, loads.
BN: They write us dirty letters, the filthy little moos. I got one from this girl and it was disgusting. It was in the early days, so I rang her up and said, “Hello, this is Nasher, what exactly is it you’d like to do to me?” and she went to pieces! That’s the way to deal with them.
MR: Which women do you think are attractive?
BN: I like Kate Bush — I wouldn’t push her out of bed if she had cold feet.
PG: And Kim Wilde, and Jamie Lee Curtis…
BN: And Nastassia Kinski and that Jennifer Beales out of Flashdance.
MR: What are your hopes and fears for the future?
PG: Well — who’s getting the round in, for a start…